Most people are not intentionally rude, insensitive, or inappropriate, but they can easily come across the wrong way to a woman who is on a hormonal roller coaster.
Here are the top 10 things most pregnant women don’t want to hear:
- “You are HUGE!” As a woman’s belly grows with pregnancy, she already feels “huge.” She doesn’t need to you to point it out.
- “You are so tiny!” is not any better. Some women may already be concerned that their baby isn’t growing enough. If their baby is small and there is a concern, their provider is already on top of it. Your opinion is not needed.
- “Are you sure it’s not twins?” Again with the size! She is already self-conscious about her expanding girth without your input.
- “You’re still pregnant!” -or- “No baby yet?” When you get to a certain gestational age, it’s pretty obvious you haven’t had the baby. Those last few months can feel like an eternity, especially when you get that question everywhere you go!
- “Aww, you look so tired/exhausted/awful/pale.” The only word you should be using to describe how a pregnant woman looks is BEAUTIFUL.
- “Was this planned?” The only person who can ask this question is the woman’s provider. You’re getting a little too personal if you ask this.
- “Aren’t you a little old/young to be pregnant?” This is a very judgmental comment and is best kept to oneself.
- “If you think this is bad, just wait until…the birth/the terrible twos/the teenage years/the sleepless nights.” Its probably best to give a new parent encouraging comments rather than attempting to warn them of impending doom.
- “Do you plan on breast feeding?” Again, this is none of your business. Talking about breastfeeding is much like talking politics. Everyone has strong opinions about it and they’re quick to try to educate anyone who will listen about what they think.
- “I sure hope you have a better birth than mine” … and then proceed with a horrible traumatic birth story. Please, please, please don’t scare a pregnant woman (especially a first time pregnant woman) with horror stories about labor and birth.
Pregnancy is a very exciting time in a woman’s life. The best things (and safest!) you can say to a pregnant woman are “You look beautiful,” and “Congratulations.”