3 Insights Giving Courage to Overwhelmed Moms Everywhere
By Dani Kurtz
Jun 2, 2015
Updated Nov 17, 2023
5 min read
The transition to motherhood is not always seamless and can be tough. You often feel like you’re in survival mode. You love your children no matter what, but nothing can prepare you for the exhaustion, crying, frustration, and loneliness that are all part of adjusting to a new baby.
You’re normal if you resent being needed so much by another person. If you think you were selfless and patient before you had children, just wait...those virtues will be tested, and you’ll have opportunities to grow and learn along with your children.
We all have different strengths, and different stages of parenting will highlight them, as well as our weaknesses. It’s okay if you don’t love the baby stage. If this describes you and your feelings, take comfort in the following three things:
All stages will pass, even when it feels like they never will.
Endurance. That’s the word that comes to my mind when I think of the baby stage. Relish the good: the opportunities you have to cuddle your baby, to see their cute little toothless grins, or to watch them take their first steps. Remember that they do grow, and they won’t be babies forever.
Everyone has their favorite stage of motherhood, and that is okay.
There is a lot of pressure to enjoy every stage of motherhood, which gives you guilt if you don’t like the one you’re in. Remember that loving your children is much different than loving the stage that you’re in. Maybe you don’t function well in one stage, but in another you’ll flourish!
Joy comes in moments.
Life as a mom is mundane. Dishes, laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, bathing the kids...our work is never done. And these tasks may stretch you beyond your natural abilities. If you pay attention, you’ll be able to find joy in little moments. These moments will sustain you through hard times. And I’ve found that if I put down my phone, stop what I’m doing, and look my child in the eye, whether they’re a baby or an older child, you will connect. You will see the love they have for you and show the love you have for them. Those moments can bring you true joy, but they have to be sought after.
Remember, you are not alone if you don’t always love being a mom. Some days are hard, and the hard days during certain stages will far outweigh the days where you feel like you have it all together. Don’t wish away those days waiting for something better.
I love how Lynnette Sheppard, mother and creator of Simply for Real, puts it, “Know that each stage of motherhood will eventually come together to create a beautiful canvas that you are now painting one brush stroke at a time. The strokes from the dark and difficult days will be just as important to the finished product as the strokes from the joyful days that pass with relative ease. When all is said and done, it will be a masterpiece. Just. Keep. Painting.”
One quick option for a day out for mom is Intermountain Alta View Hospital Ladies Night Out. This is a evening designed for moms and friends to come out and benefit from a little pampering. Come enjoy free messages, food, crafts, and classes of wellness. You can check out details or see how will be attending on the event Facebook page.
Other helpful resources: